They look to you to define them and regulate their self-esteem
We all appreciate a genuine compliment, but narcissists take it a step further and expect this type of attention from you all the time. Ultimately, their self-worth is based on how you and others view them. However, they can’t take the good with the bad because a narcissist’s identity and self-esteem lies within the approval of others. At the slightest hint of constructive feedback, they are on the defense.
Their high standards are to gain the approval of others
Narcissist will often set high, sometimes unrealistic, goals because they are interested in gaining the
They are not attuned to you or your feelings
Narcissists have a difficult time understanding their own feelings. Therefore, they won’t be attuned to yours. Simply stated, they lack empathy. Because they feel their emotions in a very superficial sense, your emotions might be viewed as annoying or confrontational. If viewed as the latter, the narcissist will be overly sensitive to your reactions because, ultimately, it impacts his or her self-image. Also, they tend to overestimate their influence on others, believing that your world revolves around them.
Their relationships are superficial
They are entitled
They are self-centered, condescending, and truly believe they are better and smarter than, well, everyone, even trained professionals. I once had a narcissist tell me I “couldn’t out psychology him.” They will dominate the room, conversations, and you. Narcissists think they are entitled to the best of everything without having to put in time or energy, and they won’t bat an eye when they exploit you to meet a need. They crave success and power and they are not humble when sharing their accomplishments. After all, they are experts on, and have an opinion about, everything.
They are constantly seeking attention
Narcissists are in a constant quest for admiration. If you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, he or she is probably seeking attention from someone other than you. They believe everyone loves them, and if a person doesn’t, he or she is simply jealous. They need to be the center of attention and will disrespect your boundaries and manipulate you to meet their personal needs. Again, you are simply there to admire and regulate their sense of self.
If these sound familiar, you might be dating a narcissist. More than likely your partner will not change his or her ways and, for your own well-being, it might be time to set some healthy boundaries and move on. Remember, it will more than likely only get worse. Your partner will continue his or her pursuit of admiration to define his or her self-worth and lose interest in you, regardless of how great you are.